Cheney Blames Vice President for Shooting Incident, Republicans Outraged

Dick Cheney has apparently joined in the liberal media’s distortion and attack machine by blaming the Vice President for the shooting this weekend. Republicans were quick to come to the defense of the President and Vice President, saying that whatever measures they needed to take in the war on terror were surely justified.

“You can’t blame anybody else,” Cheney said in an interview with Fox News Channel. “I’m the guy who pulled the trigger and shot my friend. It’s a moment I’ll never forget.”

Cheney used this tactic, referred to as “Plan B” within the administration, after his initial excuse, “it’s the other guy’s fault, he looked too much like a goddamn bird” received mixed reviews by the administration’s spin artists. Karl Rove himself was the one who finally nixed the “goddamn bird” tactic, although rumors within the White House are that he liked that one so much he’s saving it for something really important.

Scott McClellan could not be reached for comment, but we’ll just assume he said something like, “the President stands by Mr. Cheney and wishes him a speedy recovery from his upcoming drunken killing spree.”